Well, I went to Mexico and back to the Bay Area, about 1000 miles round trip, and now it doesn't make the noise anymore.
What I did, if you want to reproduce:
I filled up with 87, got the 2/3rds of my gas at a Mobil station in Buttonwillow CA (cheapest gas along the i5). Added STA-BIL 360 Marine on my fillups.
Drove aggressively and got about 27 computer mpg (My typical driving gets 33-42mpg), pedal to the metal when passing others, 90-100 was my ideal speed when the trucks didn't block the lane. Had 3 hours of idle traffic driving 18km out of Mexico in a shitshow of a freeway full of panhandlers.
I guess it melted whatever bullshit was causing the issue. Going to seafoam my crankcase and pcv intake and do an oil change in a bit.